Speed Dating: Good or Bad?

It’s been a dilemma for some in the Jewish singles dating world. How to meet and date people, form relationships, and eventually marry, while making sure they are dating Jewish people with whom cultural approaches and lifestyles are compatible. Most people in society are now used to the concept of speed dating, but not everyone realizes that the idea was originally created by Rabbi Yaacov Deyo as a way to help young Jewish people meet and marry. This type of event has augmented other relationship help methods for Jewish young people, such as online dating services.

Considering that speed dating was invented to help Orthodox Jewish singles meet and marry each other, that might turn on its head the notion that this way of meeting was designed for the more modern, hip, and perhaps even revolutionary young persons. Personals ads were regarded as questionable just a few years ago, even for those whose lifestyle was more open, so something like speed dating may be thought of as too unusual for very conservative young people to use when finding and dating Jewish partners. But on the other hand, with cultural values no longer being clearly defined within one’s own circle, and time constraints making it difficult to meet people in other ways, new methods of encountering potential partners are perhaps needed.

Speed dating has been adopted by the world in general, but it’s one of the methods Jewish young people still use. Other Jewish dating services have developed with the growth of the internet, so Jewish singles can enter their personal data and view the data of others, initiating some sort of contact if they find someone who seems interesting. Or some sites suggest potential matches for them, and they can decide if they want to pursue contact with any of those people. While the online method is now a large component in most partner searches, there are still non-internet-based Jewish singles events, and a speed dating event is just one of the possibilities available.

Using online dating sites and speed dates might actually be considered a more modern version of the old methods of a Jewish matchmaker. Remember that a matchmaker, too, tried to match certain characteristics between potential partners. Those might, at the time, have been more economic and utilitarian than criteria preferred today. But the more modern methods of dating Jewish people may simply be an adaptation of the older method, adding criteria of culture, values and personality traits as well.

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Jewish Online Dating Scene

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